“So we’ve got this bitch for two more hours. Who’s ready to do this shit,” C said.
The party bus erupted in drunken revelry and Flo Rida’s, “My House.” All the frat bros were singing along and taking turns holding each other up to do keg stands at the back of the bus.
“This is way better than the dance; I think the only point of the Spring Formal now is to give the girls an excuse to buy a fancy dress, go out to an expensive dinner, and then get totally lit,” J said.
“It reminds me of a more debauched version of prom,” I said.
“Exactly,” J said.
I stared in surprise at J as she began to shimmy out of her ball gown.
“Come on, you know there’s no way I can do this stripper pole right in this dress,” J said. “Plus, I’m not ruining my Dolce Gabbana just to do a keg stand on the back of the bus.”
The guys immediately noticed J in her underwear and heels, and began chanting, “Take it off! Take it off! Take it off!”
J began twirling around the pole, and then had B and C carry her Cleopatra style to the back of the bus for a keg stand. I’d had enough to drink at this point in the night that somehow J’s logic made complete sense. So, I stripped down along with her and two other girls. At this point I glanced around amazed at how the bus had quickly transformed from a night out at the Four Seasons to a scene right out of Playboy.
After J’s keg stand, she stood above C and demanded he strip for her now, too.
“It’s your turn. I want to see what you’re hiding under there. Show me what you’ve got,” J said.
All C’s friends cheered him on as he took to the stripper pole, throwing his tie, his Armani shirt, and his pants one after the other around the bus, revealing his leopard print boxer briefs at the end. Everyone cheered and hooted at C’s final revelation.
J started spinning upside down on the stripper pole. I still have no idea how she had the strength to pull it off. Maybe all those pole workout classes she’d taken this semester had actually been worth something. I think the Fijis were as impressed as I was, because C had been swinging like a monkey, not paying any attention, until he went balls first into another pole. He fell on top of another couple and puked everywhere. As you can imagine, everyone was ready to call it a night after that one.